Thursday, 28 July 2011

When you're a single parent, there's no shift change at 5pm

I think the most exhausting part of being a single parent, is there's no one coming throught the door at 5 or 6 to relieve you.There's no shift change or tap out. There's no division of duties or break from dinner, bath and bedtime duties. There's no adult converstaion about the day or shared time playing with little man. I miss that the most perhaps, even though it existed for such a short time.
By the time he's in bed,I'm soon to follow. I do love and appreciate all the time I have with Mekhi, but everyone needs a break.
My tap out comes once a month and that's a long lonely stretch at times.

Wednesday, 20 July 2011

You know you don't live in the most culturally diverse area when...

Everytime my sister Jodi tells this story she is brought to tears laughing.

The other day she was watching my son Mekhi for me and took him to pick up her own son from a playdate. It was just down the street so she walked as Mekhi rode his push bike. When she got there she said hello to the twins her son was playing with and their older brother (who is about 10 years old I think). The older brother said "Hey Jodi! Oh is this your homestay?" (referring to my 2 year old son as being a student coming from another country to live with a family).

At this point my sister had to look away and stifle a laugh. The mother started to apologize and commented how she really needs to get her son out of the neighborhood more. The family had recently had a homestay student themselves and I guess discussions came up about how young the students seem to be getting(meaning 10 or 11). Needless to say, imagining my barely talking 2 year old arriving on a plane, with suitcase in tow, to meet his new Canadian homestay family, is pretty hilarious.

Oh and that same day another mom asked my sister if I had "birthed him". That's a slightly odd question isn't it? Had I been there, I would love to have shared my birthing him in juicy detail! :)

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

I kissed a boy

After a very fun day and evening sipping cocktails in the sunshine with friends, I kissed a boy. Okay he wasn't actually a boy. He was a cute 37 year old single dad. But I sure felt like a young girl again; excited by the attention and touch of a cute boy.

As many of my girlfriends have told me, I've just needed to get over the hump (no pun intended, well maybe a little). It has been almost 2 years since I've shared any intimate moments with another person (Oh My God that's a long time), and that person was my husband. It has been over 9 years since I've been with anyone besides my husband. So this is all a very big deal. However the thought of ever smooching or going on a date or having sex again, has been shrugged off before I ever got too deep into daydreaming. In the back of my head I guess I know that as a somewhat young and fabulous woman I most likely will find Mr. Right at some point in the distant future. I've decided that perhaps just a cute boy to smooch (or a Mr. Right Now) is perfect and needed for the present. Afterall, I'm still going through my divorce and dedicating most of my time to raising my son, working and looking for a place of our own. I'm not too interested in getting into a relationship anytime soon. A little no-strings-attached adult time on the other hand, might just fit the bill.

I also think I needed that kiss (and subsequent kisses that went into the wee hours of the morning) as much as I needed a job. Sure it doesn't feed my son or pay any bills, but it did about as much for my self esteem. I'm starting to remember, that being a mom is part of who I am, but not everything. There is a sexy smart confident woman who still resides within me and that woman has remembered how wonderful the company of a man can be.

I must also tell you that this all happened (as well as being asked out on a date by another single dad), within days of getting and reading Rachel Sarah's book "Single Mama Seeking: Playdates, Blind dates and other Dispatches from the Dating World". Thank you Rachel! I recommend this read for all single moms needing to remember the woman within and looking for love and/ or a little loving. :)

I'm happy to say I'm over the hump!